I remember the excitement in the air when I was pregnant with my first baby. There were phone calls, hugs, shopping and eight (yup, that’s right!) baby showers.
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| Our first at just a couple weeks old! |
It tends to be that the second and third child don’t get as much pomp and circumstance. Of course they are just as special and just as much of a blessing, but the way they are celebrated in a quieter way and understandably so.
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| Our second, L, just 2 days old |
So when my friends started having their second, third {or more} children, I started to brainstorm some ways I could bless them. After all, in some ways, when I had my second and third, I needed more help than I did with my first. Here are five things we’ve done!
Bring Them Food
One of the most helpful things some friends did for me after J was born was to bring me full meals. I cannot tell you how amazingly wonderful that was for a tired and rather overwhelmed mom in those first weeks after baby came!
Some tips for bringing a meal to a mom of a new baby:
- Bring a main dish that can be frozen if they don’t need it right away (or bring it already frozen!)
- Send along cooking or reheating directions on a recipe card if needed
- If you want, include sides like a bag of frozen veggies or refrigerated baby carrots, canned fruit and of course dessert :)
Every Baby Need Diapers…
One of the gifts I frequently give to the second or third child is diapers and wipes. Even if you’re a fan of cloth like me, it’s really nice to have a pack for on the go. Baby wash or shampoo can be helpful too!
Buy Something Practical that Needs to be Replaced
You know how certain things can be passed down from kid to kid and others may need to be updated? I really appreciated my sweet friend Kayla, who sewed me some new burpcloths and washcloths when we had our third, so that’s what I’ve been getting for a few new babies lately {mine are store-bought, but you can find a super cute tutorial on making baby washcloths here}. New onesies and baby towels are also useful, especially when it’s baby number four, five or more–things get worn out by then!
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| Our third, J, at just a few days old |
Watch Her Older Children for a Day {and She’ll Love You Forever}
Well, I’d love you forever if you watched my older kids for a day anyway… :)
Sometimes you just need someone to help you out like that–even if it’s just so you can take a nap or wash a load of laundry {I’m not sure what “sleep when baby sleeps” means anyway…}.
Be an Encouragement–Pray for Her!
When a friend is having a hard time adjusting to another baby or just needs some encouragement, it’s such a blessing to have someone that will lift her up in prayer. It’s one of the best things we can do for someone we care about! Long ago, a friend gave me a page full of Scriptures that she had written down for me and I still keep it folded up in my Bible so I can read them.
Download your free printable cards “14 Scriptures to pray over your children” to give to your friend!
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WANT TO SPEAK WITH GRACE TO YOUR KIDS INSTEAD OF YELLING?
32 Comments on 5 Ways to Bless the Mom Having Her Second, Third {or More} Children
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When my second was born my SIL knew I pretty much had everything I needed for baby (she had given me tons of hand-me-downs) so she bought me a new outfit for myself so that I’d have something I could feel good in when I went to church the first week afterwards. It was very nice, I BF with it, and it was flattering cosidering I’d just had a baby. I really appreciated it!
That is an AWESOME idea! How sweet of your SIL!
I agree — meals are always helpful!!
For me, “sleep when baby sleeps” meant “quick! Baby is asleep, what can I get done!?” Ah.. if I get a next time, hopefully I’ll take advantage of naps. ;-)
I so needed this tonight! Our youth minister and his wife are having their fourth child any day now, and I really wanted to bless her somehow. These are fantastic ideas! I’m so excited to use some of them and share them with others at our church. Thanks so much!
What a great post! I thought I was the only one who ever went through those raw emotions. There were times when my friends (mostly co-op moms) received our baby news better then our own family. The one thing that I’ve learned is that, it’s all in the way you announce your pregnancy. There were times when I just was not feeling well and had to tell the family why. While on the inside I was happy, on the outside I LOOKED weak, unhappy, displeased, etc…. Anyways when it came to baby number 6, I made it a point to be joyful and happy when giving the news. And to my surprise the family’s reaction was a little more positive, not over joyed, but this time they did acknowledge baby number 6.
A joyful heart is good medicine, isn’t it? Both for us and for those around us! :)
Great ideas! I have recently started bringing frozen crockpot meals for new moms, instead of something that’s ready to eat tonight. That way, whenever they have a lull in the food they’re receiving, they can easily throw it in the crockpot and have dinner! It seems like if you receive food, it’s all brought on the same day!
That’s a great idea too!
Having recently (1 month ago) had our 5th baby, we recently were blessed by many friends. Most brought us food, a few gave gifts, and one well-meaning friend took my other children fr a FULL (sunrise to sunset) day play date the week before I delivered. I say well-meaning because the day was greatly appreciated, but last week we discovered that during that play date, one of my girls picked up lice at her house. She was not aware they had lice in the house at the time, and they have also very recently gone the process of eradicating the lice, so I am certainly not upset with her and I greatly appreciate the love she showed. However, dealing with a houseful of lice (the one daughter passed it to both her sisters and myself) along with a new baby has proven to be more work than one can imagine. Fortunately, my sister (who has dealt with lice in the past as well) has been coming by a few times a week to help us pick nits, delouse and then check over and over again when we think they are gone:)
My goodness, what a story! I’m so glad you had a knowledgeable sis to help you :)
What a helpful post! I just shared my birth story, and can’t even imagine what it is like having more than one (though God, willing we’ll find out someday soon.) Thanks for sharing a great way to bless a mama.
this is a good reminder! i know when my twins were born no one really did anything. my mil said she was going to throw us a shower but never did. while baby stuff would have been helpful (especially after purging and moving across country) what hurt the most was that no one did anything or seemed to care.
if you know a mom that has everything she needs for her new baby a blessingway is always nice.
i found this thread on blessingway’s if you aren’t familiar with them
https://community.babycenter.com/post/a27266343/blessing_way_vs_shower
Thanks for the great ideas. I’ve had five kids and each time my wonderful friends filled my freezer, showered me with love and celebrated the miracle of each new child. Though the hoopla is never the same as the first time around, the lavish love I received during all five pregnancies was sheer gift. Stopping by from Better Mom today.
Timely post! My eldest daughter just gave birth to her third child yesterday! I was privileged to be by her side as baby Mila made her grand entrance into the world. I am going to stay with her for a couple of days next week, as her husband returns to work, and take care of the house, meals and two older kiddos so she can rest and concentrate on baby and getting breastfeeding established. Then my second daughter will “replace” me and spend a few days as well. I’m looking forward to this time with my daughter and her precious family!
That’s wonderful that you can spend time with your new grandbaby! It was such a blessing to have my mom here when my babies had just been born–I definitely needed the help.
Great list!
For my last pregnancy, I had a couple friends brought meals BEFORE the babies were born. I thought that was a great idea and was so appreciative because I definitely didn’t feel like cooking those last few weeks of pregnancy!
I had some friends do that as well and I agree, it was SO nice because I didn’t feel like cooking right before my third came either! :)
Great list! My husband’s coworker’s wife brought us some food for our freezer when my second son was born. She brought lasagna and mac and cheese. Simple stuff, but it really touched me.
I love giving meals to people when they have a new baby. I’m very practical and I always figure everyone needs to eat! :)
Your post came with wonderful timing. My neighbor across the street just had her third little one! I met her and her baby (an absolute cutie) for the first time two days ago and offered to make her and her family a meal. She seemed very excited and grateful. I am hoping to do that in the next day or so. I might sneak in a practical gift too!
That’s so wonderful of you to bless someone that way! I’m sure she will definitely appreciate it!
I love the idea of burp cloths and wash rags. I’m noticing that our wash rags are getting really thin with the second child. I know some ladies expecting their 2nd/3rd, and this is a great gift idea.
Thanks so much, Anne! Glad to see you here!
These are all great ideas. I think the main thing is just letting them know that follow-up babies are just as much a blessing as baby number one! I was moved to tears with all the visits, cards, precious little outfits,giftcards and diapers for baby number 9.
Babies are blessings and this is a fantastic way to support a new mommy~because every baby is different so everytime a new baby comes…you are once again a new mommy! :)
That’s a good point Lori, you are a “new mommy” with every child! Thanks for sharing.
All moms love to be pampered and receive gifts for their new babies, even after they’ve had their 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, or whatever! Especially after the physical exertion of pregnancy and childbirth, it’s so important to remember that new mamma! I had my 6th baby last year, and thankfully my new church family has a policy to hold a baby shower if it’s the first time you’re having a baby while attending the church. What a blessing! Cute baby clothes never grow old, and we seriously did need some things because I had given everything away. I was really hurt that only 1 aunt and 1 grandmother acknowledged the new baby. Not even a card. Ouch. And these are loving, kind people. Meals are absolutely awesome, especially for a mom who has many children. A basket of homemade muffins and fruit — that would be awesome. But the most thoughtful gift I got this last time was from an elderly woman in our church whose own daughter has 10 children. She crocheted me a beautiful blanket for the baby and then wrote the loveliest note to me and included $30 for me to “treat myself” as she knew how important that was. It wasn’t the amount of money she gave me — it was the fact that she realized how important it was to pamper a mom ESPECIALLY who has several children.
Wow, that was definitely a thoughtful gift (all of them, but especially the “treat yourself” money). Like you mentioned, it seemed like when I had my third I appreciate an opportunity to be pampered more than I did with the first two!
I always get them a new pair of slippers, travel size toiletries for the hospital in a cute bag, a devotional for a new Mom and something fun to read.
Love that idea!
So very true on all five points – they are always welcomed to moms with new babies and older babies ;)
Thanks for sharing :)